A Steady Hand, A Comforting Weight
by BronBoop
Summary: Once, a weight would have signified the guilt Roy carried with him. Now, it's the comforting presence of certain amber-eyed lieutenant who refused to let him stray from his path. Another Royai fic, for all you fanboys and fangirls out there. Please R&R :)


**AN: **This was sorta kinda inspired by My-name-is-foxglove's fanfic, Black and Blond (Chapter 45: Awakening). There's a part there that says Riza would always give Roy a paperweight for his birthday, and knowing me, I just had to make some sort of metaphor.

Enjoy, and please don't forget to review.

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**A Steady Hand, A Comforting Weight**

The office was a little too warm. So Roy cracked a window open to let some of the cool summer breeze in. But, much to his dismay, a sudden gust of wind came flying into the room, scattering his papers everywhere.

With a frustrated sigh, he got on his knees and started picking up acquisition forms, transfer requests, minutes, and little scraps of paper where he'd write down ideas to be used at a later time… If he could be bothered. He should have known that the breeze would be strong enough to cast his desk in disarray. He should have used one of those paperweights Riza used to always give him for his birthday or for the holidays. A silent reminder that, even when it's a special day, there's still some work to be done.

Roy, upon gathering up all the sheets of paper that the breeze has mercilessly strewn about, sat back down on his desk and proceeded to organize his paperwork. With each pile, he'd grab a paperweight from his third drawer. One in the shape of a leaf, a souvenir from Risembool. Another made of glass with a snowflake suspended within it, from one of Riza's visits to The North. One in the shape of a Xingese lotus, which she had bought from the farmer's market back when she had just arrived in Central. Another favorite and often used one in the shape of a black and white Shiba Inu.

All these weights to hold down his work. To keep him in track. To keep him organized. To remind Roy of Riza's steady, unwavering presence.

Once a weight would have signified the load he carried on his shoulders. After Ishval, his lighthearted optimism for the future had turned into a heavy burden on his mind, on his soul. The weight would be the sounds of agony amidst a scorching hot desert. It would be the pleas for mercy for all the Ishvalans yet to be sentenced. It would be the sound of a rifle going off in the distance, saving him from an Ishvalan who had gotten too close.

The weight of knowing that Riza carried all the secrets of flame alchemy on her back, beneath her skin. The weight of knowing that he and only he would be privy to its secrets, and that Riza had chosen him to use it.

And the heaviest weight of all was the fact that she had asked him to burn it off her. The irony of burning the very thing that allowed him to conjure up fire from thin air had made him sick to his stomach. And despite being the one with third degree burns on her back, Riza still managed to ask him if he was alright.

That was her way. Even when they were younger, she had always been a steady, comforting presence in his life.

She was the only one who could keep him steady, sane. It was the only weight he welcomed in his life. Her forgiveness and unwavering faith in him had turned the crushing weight on his shoulders into something altogether freeing. She freed him from the notion that he was a helpless dog. He was a leader, and the fate of Amestris could very well lie in his hands. It was Riza who relentlessly pounded that idea into his head by being the first to stand in the way of danger, just so he could further his goals.

From her stern voice to her warm presence in the office, her hand on his shoulder reminding him of some meeting, of some general whom he had to see. And sometimes, when there was absolutely no one around to see, he would revel in the weight of her head leaning on his shoulder as she fell asleep in his arms. It was as if she would shed off her armor and allow herself to be just a woman in need of his warmth as she drifted off into slumber.

Roy's reverie was cut short as he heard the sound of his office door clicking open. Riza stood in the doorway with yet another bunch of folders for him to look through. Yet despite the implication that it meant more work from him, he could overlook this to just smile at having her within his field of view.

"Sir, these are the forms for the placement of the new recruits." She said, in her usual stern voice, "You'll need to have them approved by the end of the day."

"But it's almost 5 o'clock!" Roy whined as he motioned to the clock in the room.

"Ah, so it is, sir. Perhaps early tomorrow morning would be a better time."

Riza set the stack of folders on his desk, allowing her hand to linger for just half a second longer on the top folder. Roy saw this as an invitation to take her hand into his.

"Sir…"

"Don't worry, the rest of the team won't be back to gather up their stuff for another couple of minutes." He gave her his best seductive smile, the one that, if they were in the bedroom, would have turned her knees into jelly.

Unfortunately, its intended effect was lost in the strict formality of their headquarters. So Riza simply gave him a patient and slightly stern warning look. "Sir, this is not the appropriate place."

He pulled her hand closer and proceeded to kiss her knuckles. Despite having been a soldier for years, Riza's hand still maintained a balance of delicacy and strength, something that Roy always found irresistibly sexy.

"Sir," she started again, "Perhaps we can continue this at a later time. At my place..."

She let the end of her sentence linger on. As always, it had the intended effect of making Roy grin like a giddy teenager. With this, she then took her hand from within his grasp and started walking towards her desk.

Roy, placated, then looked back at whatever work he could manage to squeeze in until their work day had ended. Upon seeing the stacks of papers secured by the paperweights Riza had given him, his mind wandered back to his earlier thoughts.

_She's the constant weight that keeps me grounded, the only one who can pull me back into reality when my ghosts are haunting me. I'd be a scattered mess without her resolute will always leading me towards the right path. Hell knows what a sorry state I'll be in if she weren't here._

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**AN: **Cheesy, yeah? You can sort of tell that I had no idea where to end it. But please leave a review anyway. Thank you, thank you, thank you!


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